Unmatched

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Just 2 days or less than 24 hours after being dumped, I thought I would grab myself up and get back into the dating pool. Approaching 32, I no longer look at the pursuit of dating, marriage, and kids as a marathon, but rather a middle distance race. Yeah, I know Halle and others are making middle-aged moms a fashionable thing to be as of late. However, it has never been my interest to traipse around town at 50 with a 2 year old in tow.

Seeing all the commercials about the success stories and the complexity in matching up people, I decided to try out E-Harmony. My friend told me to stay away because it was super religious and they didn’t accept gays. I’m neither – so I thought I would give it a shot anyway. After filling out a lengthy questionnaire with odd questions I was hit with the “unmatchable” at the end of my survey. I was already feeling down in the dumps after being in two unsuccessful relationships in 1 year and then I was told I was unmatchable. What a hit to my self esteem.

I shared this story with others and they thought it was funny. They made me feel better knowing that they too were unmatchable – whatever that means. So, I’m interested in knowing what dating sites have worked for other people, do you recommend dating sites at all, and what are some tips to help me get back on my feet? – and honestly please don’t tell me prayer. I’m not all that interested in prayer.

About danismelange

I enjoy writing for fun, reading, traveling, and meeting new people. I'm a mother, sister, auntie, and friend. I write what comes to my mind - its unpretentious, honest, and straight from my heart!

4 responses »

  1. Ok Miss Dani,You are probably not going to want to hear this but I am going to say it anyway. Maybe you should take some time to yourself. That is, don't join any dating sites, attend any speed dating events, participate in any blind dates, etc. Just do you. As difficult as it sounds (and believe me, it is not easy) I believe it is the best possible option at this time.I have always been a firm proponent of taking "me time" when a relationship ends to gain perspective. So much happens in a relationship that we are not aware of, that is until we take time to analyze the complete situation. (Oftentimes, we change- sometimes for the better sometimes for the worst. And perhaps you feel as though you understand the situation.) Maybe you are like, "He's a jerk, end of story". And perhaps you are right.However, if you want to change paths and find a situation that works for you, you need to sit down and honestly identify what you want, what you can tolerate (what you can't tolerate) and HAVE PATIENCE! (wink) Don't settle. In the past are the days when you commit to someone who is great as long as they change a couple of major things. Well, ummh maybe not quite a couples of things more like 5, on second thought make that 10, or 15, ummhh well you get the point. Yes, you might have to wait a bit….. But honey, ain't you worth it?

  2. Thanks for the suggestions and thanks for reading! But I think it's ok to have friends and date when you are fresh out of a relationship. I have no intentions nor am I ready to be committed to someone, but movies and conversation over some tea I think is healthy and cathartic at the same time! I've never gone to speed dating and never signed up for any dating sites. I think I was angry and just lashed out! ALSO my friend and I talked about doing it as a social experiment. Now, I am even more intrigued about the dating sites – especially since they said "unmatchable". I am really interested in finding out how the logorithims (sp) work that they use to come up with this stuff:)

  3. I think we all can appreciate the honesty in your writing. I certainly do and trust me when I say I can relate to all of it. Well, you know all of my stories. Now I waiting for more to read so get to work writing!

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